No more next Mondays.

I'm tired of being fat.

Everyone tells me that I am not fat, but that I am just a big guy, while this is true, I am also fat.

I am 6'4, 25 years old and I weigh at least 350lbs.

It's time to do something about this.

Using this website:

http://www.bmi-calculator.net/bmr-calculator/

I calculated that my BMR is 3029 calories and that my BMI is 28.26%. According to the chart on this site, I am obese. Now, I know that I am not obese and this probably isn't the best measure of my actual BMI, but alas I am lazy and it is going to have to do for now.

I do not expect to have 6 pack abs at the end of my journey. I just want to, for the first time since I was in elementary school feel comfortable taking my shirt off in public. At the beach, in the pool, at the lake, tubing down the river, walking around the house, or just when I am working my ass off outside. I do not even walk around the house with my shirt off and there isn't even anyone to look at me here.

I hate the way I look so much that I don't even look at myself with my shirt off.

At this point it seems pertinent to explain that I am very muscular, I bench press over 450 lbs and my legs are like tree trunks. I carry all my weight in my stomach and my moobs. If I could actually just get rid of the fat in my moobs I would be happier than a pig in shit. I have had them almost since I can remember and do not know how to get rid of them. I have done some pretty extensive research into gynecomastia, but short of seeing a doctor and being diagnosed I am at this time uncertain whether I do in fact have it.

I am so resentful of them that I have actually considered taking out an extra student loan to have breast reduction, I wish every day that I would win the lottery so that I could at least get tested to see if I am afflicted by it. I even occasionally, only for a few seconds ponder actually taking a knife to them. I resent them that much.

The hardest part of all of this for me is that while in high school I was an offensive and defensive lineman and by the time my senior year rolled around and the end of football season came I was 6'4 and about 270 lbs and was in good enough shape to run about an 8 minute mile. I could eat anything I wanted and not gain a pound. Then football season ended and I started preparing for weightlifting season. I did almost zero cardio and I got up to about 295 lbs. At this point in my life it was nothing for me to be able to shed 10 pounds in a week to a week and a half.

I graduated high school and went to college, got a full time job, and was taking a full load of classes and I just stopped working out all together. After my first year I was easily up to 325. a couple more years of this 40 hrs a week of work and a full semester load and I just kept ballooning. I lied to myself and other people always saying I was around 315, but I hadn't been at that weight since my freshman year in college.

Earlier this year I was up to 365 but the summer job that I had involved a lot of walking, barely any fried foods and a lot of milk and vegetables. I am going to try to get back on this diet and stop eating the way that I do. I also drank quite a bit of water instead of sprite or tea or lemonade like I drink now.

I am not going to deny myself anything per se, I am just going to try to be more sensible about what I eat and do a lot more cardio. I am not even going to go to the gym for the time being, just run and do body weight exercises; push ups, sit ups, etc.

I am going to do something that is against everything that I think right now and, later today put up a pic of myself for reference purposes. So that I can see my progression. I am going to try to put up a picture of myself around the same time every month to try and track my progression. My plan is to try to keep my caloric intake to around 500 calories under my BMR and to try to burn at least 500 calories a day doing cardio. I will track my cardio with the Nike+ app on my itouch and try to figure out a way to post my rums on here. My goal is to burn around 3500-4000 calories a week doing cardio which is around a 1lb of weight a week in cardio and also a pound of weight a week in calorie intake. Not knowing how to count the calories I burn doing push up etc, I will not figure them in and consider them a bonus in my loss.

If I am not netting a minimum 2lb weight loss per week or if the 4000 calories of cardio is accomplished easily I will ramp up the cardio or decrease my caloric intake even more. Along with posting about my runs I am also going to try to keep track to the best of my abilities what I eat every day and the amount of calories contained with in.

All of this seems like a lot of work, but I believe it is what I need to do to actually make my fat ass go through with this. My ultimate goal is to try to get to between 285 and 290 lbs by May 1. Which at my current guestimated weight of 350 lbs that is a 60 to 65 lb weight loss in a little more than 24 weeks, just saying 25 weeks time, I need to lose a little more than 3.5 lbs a week to make it there. I think that this is very feasible and do-able as long as I keep to this blog and the things that I have said in it.

All of this being said I offer myself these two quotes,

“Self respect is the fruit of discipline” and “Only a fool wants what he cannot have.”